Is Spelling "at" Really All That Challenging?

It was parent-teacher conference day this week. Always fun, especially when your kid is doing really well (ok, except when it comes to practicing self control... you know what they say about the apple and the tree... I take the genetic blame here). So why am I so annoyed?

On the one hand, I am delighted that my son has surpassed grade level in reading (and it's only March!), that the gym teacher thinks my son has "some arm" and is a joy to have around, that the art teacher treasures the fact that he's one of those kids who sees, say, spilled paint bleeding into the next color not as a mistake that needs to be fixed ASAP but as a cool creation...

Spelling test at school

On the other hand, I am fuming a bit because I pay exorbitant school taxes for schools in a high-performing district (with great teachers, many earning 6 figures) and a chunk of the education my son is getting seems to be about as challenging as putting on a shoe with the light off -- maybe a little difficult the first time, but after that, easy.  Not all of the education (the science is pretty darn cool and he loves it, for example, and some things in each subject are a challenge...) and not all of the time, but enough to make me mad for now. Maybe because it's the basics that seem, well, way, way, way too basic and there's mostly lip-service to differentiation -- at least the meaningful kind. NOTE: This post is not about teacher-bashing.

I am not one of those crazies who thinks my first grader should be doing calculus or reading Proust by the time he's in third grade. But I do think it's ridiculous that he gets the highest mark -- a 4 -- for spelling 48 words right when the hardest word is "want" or "would" and the majority of the words include reeeaaaaalllllly challenging stuff like "at," "me," "I," "the." Is this ALL they expect of the kids??? 

The math program is bad enough -- but Cullen could spell those words in the fall in kindergarten (and was required to by his teacher b/c he was in her "high-achiever" group of kids who knew the sight words in five seconds, so she challenged them to spell them). Wondering about that 4? ... Is it an A, is it an A+, is it meaningless in real life? Nobody knows. Standards based report cards offer no grades, but a 4 is "exceeds proficiency standard."

So what happens when you exceed the benchmark and then start to exceed the benchmark for the NEXT GRADE? Hmmm... well, that's not considered in such parameters... read on...

So, on the bright side, my son went from reading level 12 (which is where they expect them to be at this point of the year) in late November to reading level 20 last week when she did the assessments. Guess what the "proficient" (aka, marked a 3 for meeting the standard) is for first grade at the END of the year for a proficient mark? A level 16-18. So, here he is, with three months left, and he's already exceeded that and been marked a 4. At this rate, he'll be at level 30 before he finishes first grade...

Kumon sheet from January

The teacher also handed me some math practice worksheets (a miracle...!) with REAL math. Except that all but one page was too easy for my son, with the hardest problem aside from the last page of problems being 9 minus 6 or something equally not-hard.  I then showed her photos of Cullen's recent Kumon workbook pages (the iPhone is handy for that) that revealed he'd gotten an entire two page review correct on problems addin numbers as high as 10 to numbers as high as 30 and subtracting from 20. While we try to get him to do at least four pages a week -- that's only two lessons -- when he's into it (which isn't every day) he'll sometimes do that in one sitting.

On the negative side, I can already tell he's bored. I see it in his sloppy handwriting, racing through the easy problems and assignments (and therefore sometimes getting them wrong even though I know he knows the answers). His teacher sees it, too, although she also attributes it to his general personality (that's partly true, too). I've seen this movie before... and without projecting too much of my own experience onto my son, I know that it only gets worse if the child isn't challenged academically.

And that's the biggest issue. In general, the school has almost nothing to offer kids like him as far as enrichment or challenge. Yes, he is in the higher-level reading group, and the teacher pushes them to think about the stories and asks them more comprehension questions. That's valuable. But next year? At this rate, he'll be halfway through the second grade benchmarks before he finishes first grade.

The teacher tried some computer games the school offers for math enrichment, but technology and my boy are a bad mix educationally. For him, it is all a game. He'll guess and guess and never learn or absorb the lesson because he's sucked in by reaching the "win." I suspect/hope he will grow out of it, but right now, putting him in front of the computer isn't enriching or educational. For math, that's all she really has at her disposal -- or all she's willing to push since the core math program isn't really math, enriching only involves adding more inane ways to measure an object (don't get me started...).  

Is it wrong that I expect better than this? I just want the level of real differentiation I keep being promised for my son. I am not alone. I know one mom who pulled her child out of kindergarten mid-year and transferred to a private school because promises of challenge were never kept and her son was bored to tears... and many, many others paying big bucks to tutors or after-school enrichment programs. The school system, like many around the country, says it offers differentiation for kids at all levels. There's all sorts of stuff to help the struggling kids. But not much to help the middle kids achieve more and even less for the kids like my son who isn't a child-prodigy but is bright and can and should be doing more... It's the blank-stare-of-death when you ask something like that. Or you get a defensive reaction...

How about an up arrow for challenge?

My son likes school a lot and likes his teacher (she really is a nice lady). But he's that kid who'd like anything that he can do where he can participate, be a part of it all... to raise his hand and answer the questions and hurry up and get to snack time.  He's often ready for the next activity or assignment because he's figured out whatever it is he's doing and he's ready to move on because, umm, it's boring now, so what's next? Even his teacher sees that as part of what's going on. But he's happy when he goes to school every morning and he's usually got something exciting to tell me at the end of the day. Maybe I should accept that and not worry that he's not being challenged about half the time. Maybe I am a little crazy. Maybe I should sit back and wait for the later grades when parents tell me that it does get more challenging.

But that feels wrong. What about the time in between? My son  is an insanely curious child who sees the world in ways a 6yo doesn't usually see the world and to listen to him ask a zillion questions and then draw the most interesting and advanced conclusions is to recognize he's a really bright kid who needs something more to really flex that. When he's challenged, he gets into the work like it's second-nature to take his time and figure it out and absorb it... no hurry up and get to the next thing, no ants in his pants... it's like watching the internal workings of a complex timepiece moving in tandem, intricate mechanisms seeming to go in opposite directions, but really not... you can literally see him processing and thinking.

He's not in a class of 30 and the kids do get art, and a good measure of music, gym and science... that's not what he'd have if we stayed in the city. But I also now have a mortgage and a house and taxes and I still don't know that I have done all that much better by my son educationally (and my daughter, lord help me). I don't know what the answer is. Part of me feels strongly that I need to put him in a private school even though I have long been a proponent of public education and even though it might send us to the brink of bankruptcy. Short of that, I feel like I need to find strong enrichment for him after school, but I'm working FT, my husband works FT... and that's not changing anytime soon.

I know I'll figure it out. But for today, I'm just not sure how yet.